St Fagans

We had friends Karen and ray visit from Liverpool over the weekend. So we did the good host thing and took them to a few local tourist spots. It’s a shame that it takes visitors from away to make me go to some of the great places in the area. Staurday was St Fagans and Sunday was Big Pit.

They are both part of the National Museum of Wales, both free and both wonderful days out.

St Fagans is a natural history museum, and used to be called the museum of Welsh life. It has recreated houses and other buildings from all geographical and chronological parts of Wales. The row of Rhydycar cottages show life through the ages, and I recognised many items from visits to my grandparents when I was growing up.

Big Pit

The trip underground at Big Pit is an excellent experience. Our tour guide Peter was an ex-miner, and had an endless supply of anecdotes. He was the kind of guy you’d like to share a pint with.

We all turned out lamps off and the picture shows how dark it was. It’s the darkest dark you will ever see. Or not see, as it were.

The above ground exhibitions are a great addition since my last trip 15 years or so ago.

Doctor Who

The last trip was to the Doctor Who exhibition in Cardiff Bay. It’s a really good exhibition, but only covers the most recent series of Doctor Who; the ones featuring Christopher Ecclestone and David Tennant. It figures really. These are the ones made by BBC Wales in and around Cardiff.

Word is the BBC is currently filming a new series of Doctor Who, and in March they will be filming a new series of Torchwood. Then at the end of the year they film a new children’s’ TV spin-off called The Sarah Jane Adventures. Phew. No rest for the aliens.

Random stuff I like

Instead of just ranting about all the things I hate, I thought for a change I’d tell you about stuff I like. Here’s a list. It’s far from comprehensive, and in no particular order.

Cath (of course)
Ebbw Vale rugby
Sunny Sunday afternoons at the cricket
A crisp autumn day in New England
Snowy days spent under the duvet
Jaffa Cakes
Warm slippers
Cold lager
A Jack Daniels and coke (or two)
Being spoiled for choice at the ice cream shop in St Pete Beach
A nice sit down with a newspaper and a cup of coffee
Marvin
Watching the Red Sox
Snorkeling in the Maldives
Eggnog lattes at Starbucks
Frank Lloyd Wright architecture
Norman Rockwell paintings
Being by the sea
Dilbert
NFL Sundays
Old steam trains
Pictures form the Hubble telescope
John Wayne war movies and westerns
An atlas
Croissants or bagels for breakfast
Viz
Star Trek, The Sopranos and The West Wing
Doctor Who and Torchwood
Killer sudoku
Marmite
My 4x4
Bill Bryson
Italian, Indian and Mexican food

Rugby Thoughts

Ten things I think I think following the weekend’s Six Nations games:

1. I think that Wales made an improvement over the Scotland game. They played well against Ireland, and shockingly poorly at Murrayfield. This was a big improvement, but the stats don’t lie. Wales had a lot of defending to do. They made 98 tackles, but crucially missed 13 tackles. That’s 13 too many against France.

2. I think that Wales gave away too many stupid penalties again. Everybody knows that in the lineout you can’t grab the opposition jumper in the air. Everyone that is, except Wales who twice gave away penalties that everyone in the stadium could spot.

3. I think that they should run a golden injury competition. Yes, Mark Jones went down in the 7th minute, and finally went off injured in the 46th. He seems to be the Darren Anderton of rugby. When is the last time he actually played a whole game?

4. I think that Shane Williams was trying too hard. He had a poor game as he tried to be everywhere and be a maverick. Running around like a headless chicken, often being caught miles out of position, doesn’t make you exciting. It makes you a liability.

5. I think Stephen Jones improved, but still has a long wasy to go to catch up the best outside halves in the Six Nations. David Skrela had a far better game than Jones, and was deservedly man of the match (hold the front page – I just agreed with Jonathan Davies).

6. I think that Garteh Jenkins’ record as national coach isn’t good. After nine games, the only wins come against the Pacific Islands and Canada. The pressure will really be on if they go down in Rome in two weeks time.

7. I think that the delay to get the ref’s microphone sorted out was needed by Ireland. There were tears in the eyes of John Hayes and many other players following the national anthems, and they needed a bit of time to get their game faces on.

8. I think that Paul O’Connell was a tower of strength in the Irish pack. He could play for Ebbw Vale any time. Dennis Leamy and David Wallace were awesome too – they could get on Ebbw’s bench.

9. I think England were out-played and bullied out of their game in Ireland. David Strettle looked like a rabbit caught in the headlights when Shane Horgan barged past him.

10. I think that it was a matter of time before Italy won away from home. Thye caught Scotland cold, and would have held on to a 21 point lead against any team in the Six Nations.

Ebbw Vale’s Dai Langdon put up a good show in the Wales U19 game the other week against Ireland U19. He scored a try and kicked well, including a bizarre touchline drop goal conversion when the support team failed to get the kicking tee onto the pitch in time.

Things that make you go “hmm”

Why do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front?

Why do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters?

Why do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage?

Cricket Notes

In searching the web for any signs of the now-defunct Beaufort Cricket Club (nothing to be found), I found this link to another ex-player Neil Price.

Definition of the week

Urban tumbleweed: Plastic shopping bags, discarded newspapers or other debris that blow haphazardly through the streets - just before getting stuck to the front grille of your car. (Courtesy of Buzzwhack)

Link of the week

This week’s link is to another blog. Its run by PC Magazine, but covers all sorts of flotsam and jetsam of the world. No trivia is too small for Dvorak.

Guinness Marmite

What more is there to say?

Its sounds like the perfect combination: Marmite and Guinness. They’ve teamed up, in time for St Patrick’s Day, to create a special limited edition Guinness Marmite.

In shops now. In fact, Tesco was sold out when I went to get mine last week. Doh!

No clash on 28 April

Ebbw Vale crashed out of the cup last Saturday, going down 16 – 18 to Swansea. I had very mixed feelings about the game.

As table-toppers with just six league games left, I felt that a cup run could get in the way of the serious business of winning the Premiership. It also neatly did away with any concerns about a possible clash – the Konica Minolta cup final is scheduled for Saturday 28 April; which also just happens to be my wedding day. I would have received huge amounts of grief if the guests had to choose between the wedding and a possible second cup final appearance for Ebbw.

As for the game itself, both sides seemed intent on trying to lose the game. Swansea’s place kicking was woeful, but Ebbw refused to put together any sort of consistent play to put the game away. As soon as Ebbw got a try through Ian George, some sloppy play let Swansea back in. That said, Swansea flanker Ben Lewis was the best player on the field.

The South Wales Argus had some sensible things to say, including: “Next up is a crucial game at Pontypridd, but Vale haven't become a poor side overnight and if they can focus on the basics that propelled them to the top of the Premiership table then they will be fine.”

Picture is of Nelly and John Bowd modelling the new away kit at home on Saturday (I know, I don’t understand either). There’s lots more on Graham’s site.

Scorers: Try for Ian George, conversion and three penalties for Sam Mills.

Highlight: Andrew McLaughlan is growing into a top class attacking full back, and Neil Edwards is always worth the admission money for his craft in the line out.

Lowlight: Referee Keri Evans’ penalty for collapsing a tackle was a clear turning point. That said, we didn’t put the Jacks away and so didn’t deserve the win.

Saturn

Spent Valentine's evening at astronomy class. We used the University's telescope to look at Saturn. Saw some amazing things, but the view wasn't quite as good as ths though.

This image of Saturn's rings crossing the globe was captured by the space launch Cassini during its approach to Saturn on May 21, 2004.

Marvin

Here's a picture of Marvin. No particular reason, it's just a nice picture.

Glamorgan to return to Ebbw

Glamorgan have confirmed that they will be playing a Pro40 game (John Player League in old money) at Ebbw Vale’s Eugene Cross Park this coming summer. It’ll be on Sunday 29 July against Middlesex. I’ll be there.

It follows on from a four-day game at Abergavenny against Leicestershire. It’ll be just like the old days, especially since Glamorgan aren’t going to be any good this season.

Hotel Notes

Spent a wonderfully snowy pre-Valentine’s weekend at Llangoed Hall. Just like last year it was a great retreat into the countryside, where luxury is the watchword. Our room usually goes for around £300 a night, but in the winter (thankfully) it’s a lot cheaper.

Driving up to Brecon I was amazed to see the number of sledders and snowballers enjoying a day at Storey Arms. Saw the usual selection of snowmen, but a full-size igloo was the top piece of ephemeral art.

Restaurant Notes

Ate at the Griffin in Llyswen on Saturday evening. The food was good hearty fare, with winter-warming stews and casseroles dominating. As they proclaim, it’s “slow food” and it’s very good too. The restaurant was very quiet but bar meals and arguments on where Wales went wrong were prominent in the bar.

Book Notes

Spent part of Sunday at Hay-on-Wye. There’s more books than you can shake a stick at.

Bizarrely, it has this past week been twinned with Timbuktu. No, I’m not making this up, here’s the story.

Rugby Thoughts

Ten things I think I think following the weekend’s Six Nations games:

1. I think that Wales looked desperately one-dimensional. It seems that Gareth Jenkins isn’t the new Great Redeemer after all. Just goes to show what can happen when you let The Western Mail pick the national coach.

2. I think that Rhys Thomas gave away any chance of a win with his stupidity. His trip to the sin bin couldn’t have come at a worse time.

3. I think that Wales need to improve its discipline: they can’t afford to give away that many kickable penalties.

4. I think that I would have been worried if Ebbw Vale had played that badly. Thankfully it was only Wales.

5. I think that BBC Wales’ claim to provide comprehensive coverage of the 6 Nations is misguided. Exhibit A: Last week they provided live coverage of the U20 game between Wales and Ireland at the Liberty Stadium in Swansea. This week, Wales U20 played in Scotland on Friday night. BBC coverage? Nothing on Friday and just two minutes of highlights on Sunday.

6. I think that David Wallace looks like the best openside flanker in the 6 Nations. Martin Williams is a close second.

7. I think that when Geordan Murphy missed that tackle on Raphael Ibanez for France’s first try, it was the first hint of things to come that day.

8. I think that they must have invented rainproof paint to use to mark out the sponsors logos. It must be embarrassing for RBS to see the players daubed in blue paint.

9. I think that the atmosphere at Croke Park in Dublin was electric. So they finally allowed “foreign sports” at Croke Park and other gaelic sports arenas. Reminds me of the time when I was in Galway to watch Connacht and Ebbw Vale. When we asked a local where the rugby ground was he replied “I don’t follow foreign sports”.

10. I think that when I was at Lansdowne Road a few years the atmosphere was amazing, with Fields of Athenry ringing out, but a ticket for an Ireland game at Croke Park this season may be the toughest ticket in all of rugby.

Valentine’s Note

I love you, Cath.

Snowy Pontypridd

It's the first snow of winter, so we can't complain really.

3 inches of snow conspire to get the BBC into "travel chaos" mode. 700 schools got closed for the day. Temperatures "plummeted" to -4C (25F in real money).

The pic is of the new bird table, constructed by Cath with me acting as foreman whilst laid up. That's the proper order of things.

There's a few more Pontypridd in the snow pictures on my Flickr site.

Why it's great to be a man…

Parallel parking - Bosh, straight in. first time.

Opening jars - She's struggling. You take it from her hands, open it effortlessly and pretend she loosened it for you. She didn't. Jars are men's work.

Sharpening a pencil with a stanley knife - Blunt, is it? Hand it here love. No, I don't need a sharpener, you think I can't whittle?

Going to the tip - A manly act which combines driving, lifting and - as you thrillingly drop your rubbish into another huge pile of other rubbish - noisy destruction.

Drinking up - Specifically, rising from the table, slinging your coat on and downing two thirds of a pint in one fluid movement. Then nodding towards the door, saying, "Let's go" and striding out while everyone else struggles to catch up with you. God, you're hard. (OK, not my strong suit, this one.)

Having a thin bit of wood - In the shed, solely to stir paint with.

Using power tools - Slightly more powerful than you need or can safely handle. One Handed with a pencil on the ear? Superb.

Carving the roast - And saying "are you a leg or breast man" to the blokes and "do you want stuffing" to the women. Congratulations, you are now your dad.

Phone calls that last less than a minute - Unlike women, we get straight to the point: "Alright? Yep. Drink? Rugby Club? Seven it is then. See ya."

Having earned that pint - Since the dawn of time, men have toiled in the fields in blistering heat. Why? So, when it's over we can stand there in silence, surveying our work with one hand resting on the beer gut while the other nurses a foaming jug of ale. Aaaah.

Knowing which screwdriver is which - "A Phillips? For that? Are you mad, woman?"

Taking a newspaper into the loo - A visual code that says that's right, I'm going in there for a huge, long man-sized movement.

Old Joke Notes

Q: Why should you never replace your sandwich toaster?
A: Better the Breville you know.

Book of the Week

Here’s a link to a book that’s been written by an old Brynmawr cricket club colleague, Michael Cole. It’s called The Sigma Code, and available from a select band of good book shops. My local rag, the Gwent Gazette has the whole story.

Link of the Week

http://www.spatial-literacy.org/ is a great website which shows where your surname comes from. This map of Veale seems to come from the south west of England, which ties in with existing family links – there are a few distant Veales down Minehead way.

Garden Notes

The RSPB is carrying out its annual birdwatch. Have a look in your garden and report your findings on this website.

The top 10 for Rhondda Cynon Taff area in 2006 were:

1 house sparrow
2 chaffinch
3 blue tit
4 blackbird
5 starling
6 greenfinch
7 jackdaw
8 robin
9 great tit
10 magpie

During an unscientific and occasional study of my bird table in the garden today I spotted: blue tit, willow tit, dunnock, collared dove, greenfinch, robin, blackbird and magpie.

Rugby Notes

Another win for Ebbw Vale on Saturday, this time a 25-19 victory at home to Bedwas. It was a game we should have put away early on, but we failed to put enough points on the board to give ourselves a safety margin. As with the Swansea game a couple of weeks ago, the final whistle came as we were pinned back on our own goal line battling to save the game.

Someone on the terrace said that the best team lost. Bedwas were probably the best team for the last ten minutes when they played with some belief: if they had shown the same endeavour earlier in the game they could easily have come away with the win.

Young hooker Ben Roberts showed well and the pack was again a force to be reckoned with. Bedwas’ pack fronted up well though, and played up to and beyond the laws. The referee did little to restrain them and the game ended up being very frustrating and a pretty poor spectacle.

Scorers: Two tries for Andrew McLaughlan and one each for wings Simon Hunt and Gareth Miles. One long range penalty for Dai Langdon and one conversion for Bryan Shelbourne.

Highlight: Ebbw’s first try was a cracker. From the first line-out in Ebbw territory a rolling maul rumbled for 20 yards before the ball was released across the back line for Macca to score wide out. Magnificent.

Lowlight: That score should have opened the floodgates, but a succession of missed kicks at goal and handling errors kept the score close. Teams need to be put away early and not given endless chances to come back into the game.

Bizarre moment: Referee Neil Ballard had a few strange moments. He awarded a mark to the Bedwas fullback despite the ball bouncing straight out of his hands. Apparently its enough nowadays to simply get a hand on the ball to get the mark. Just one of the strange/unusual/shocking decisions – but worryingly nothing worse than was expected.

Title chase: There are just 6 leagues left for Ebbw, and we currently hold a 6 point lead. The next game is a month away, and the injury-plagued squad could use the rest. Next up on Saturday 17 February when we host Swansea in the last 16 of the Konica Minolta Cup.
TV

Rugby Thoughts

Ten things I think I think following the weekend’s Six Nations games:

1. I think the Wales and Ireland was a magnificent game. Shame about the other two games over the weekend.

2. I think Matthew Rees and Aled Brew were serious downgrades when they came on as replacements for Rhys Thomas and Hal Luscombe. And Chris Czekaj needs to be stronger. He got stopped and turned far too easily.

3. I think that we’re still waiting for James Hook’s moment of magic. The magic belonged to O’Driscoll and D’Arcy yesterday.

4. I think that the bright spots for Wales were the play of Dwayne Peel and Kevin Morgan, and the energy of the pack.

5. I think referee Kelvin Deaker was way too lenient on Ireland. Four examples:
- He let Ireland delay their line out on numerous occasions when they couldn’t get the calls heard.
- Ireland got away with slowing down the ball at ruck and maul way too often
- Easterby’s kicking the ball out of Peel’s hands while lying in a ruck should have been a yellow card
- Easterby’s tackle on Czekaj when he didn’t have the ball was worthy of at least a penalty. He ref gave nothing.

6. I think Dennis Hickie looked like Terry Butcher with all that claret running down his face.

7. I think Jonathan Davies is an idiot. The most insightful he got through the whole match was to shout “numbers” or “there’s no full back”. Genius. Well worth the TV licence fee.

8. I think Jonny’s back. So are England. They’ve got a great half back pairing – Harry Ellis looks like a very useful scrum half.

9. I think that the TV match official should be sacked for allowing Jonny Wilkinson’s try when his foot was clearly in touch. It was a great effort, but it wasn’t a try.

10. I think that the ref’s decision at the Wales and Ireland U20 game was even worse. He should have used the TV review instead of making one of the worst calls in recent years when denying Wales’ Tom James a try. Replays showed that James was nowhere near the touchline yet the ref awarded a lineout.

Superbowl Notes

Hated watching the whining Peyton Manning win the Superbowl. Every mistake was blamed on someone else on his team. And to challenge a call because you tried to be sneaky and catch the Bears changing their formation was low.

In the end there was a certain inevitability about their 29-17 win. Devin Hester’s TD run from the kickoff only served to give the game a little balance. Rex Grossman was as bad as the previews suggested. Peyton won the MVP award simply because nobody stood out on this particular rain-soaked Miami evening.

As for the TV coverage, as least Sky had the sense to use the official CBS commentators of Jim Nance and Phil Simms, infinitely better than any UK dumbed-down crew.

View from under the shawl

This blog has (for one posting only) been hi-jacked by Klizzie, in order to bring you his "View from under the shawl". Normal service will be resumed soon.

Do They Really Have Leprechauns in Honolulu then butt?
Of Monarchs, Jackson Pollock, Aloha! and early starts….

Ebbw Vale RFC is one of the so called unfashionable clubs of Welsh Rugby. Not the city slickers of Cardiff or Swansea not the rich history of Neath or Newport not the fame of Llanelli. Ebbw Vale is an honest club which has honest, hard working players. A dedicated coaching and backroom staff, who work tirelessly. And of course they have absolutely mental supporters.

These supporters decided to prove that they too are unfashionable by declaring that the Boxing Day ‘derby’ at Llandovery was to have a dress code -- Hawaiian! Oh and don’t forget the Santa Hats. A ‘derby’ match created by the relegation of both Pontypool and Carmarthen Quins meaning that Llandovery and Ebbw found themselves as odd men out when the other twelve clubs had close encounters with the neighbours. Still never mind, the extra hour travelling time meant a valuable hour away from the in-laws and the turkey and the festive TV.

Alex Codling Ebbw’s head coach left his London home at 6:30 on Boxing morning to get to the match in time, true commitment indeed from a man who has done more than anyone to return Ebbw to its rightful place in the upper echelons of Welsh rugby. True commitment maybe but paling into insignificance when put against the dozens of Ebbw fans who started weaving grass skirts from left over wrapping paper as soon as the Christmas lunch had gone down and the Queen had delivered her wise words.

Llandovery are known as the Drovers and so it was that Ebbw fans went in their droves to rural Carmarthenshire, it was a bit like Marilyn Manson going to the knitting circle of the Women’s Institute but still rugby is rugby and surely Ebbw would be welcome.

The migration of the Monarch butterflies from Mexico to the United States is said to be one of the greatest spectacles in the animal kingdom, along with the journey of the wildebeest and a mate of mine doing breakfast, but even this must have been rivalled by the sight of hundreds of brightly coloured shirts speeding westward along the A40 on Boxing Day afternoon. The wearers of the shirts were well lubricated to help the journey west flow by more pleasantly and not to worry if some of the bumps on the road cause a festive chunder no-one will notice with those shirts on, boys. Some things never change though and Mike wore his best brown Parka.

One of the best shirts was deported by Geezer the erstwhile head of the “English by Birth” (EBB) Ebbw fan club. I’ve seen clothes horses with better dress sense. He’d borrowed his shirt from a fellow EBB Ebbw fan who happens to be a vet. ‘The Vet’ himself failed to make the trip west fearing that he be called upon to deliver a calf or put down a horse in the heartland of agricultural Wales instead of watching the game. Another eight of ‘The Vet’s shirts did make the trip however Hawaiian being normal social attire for him and sometimes normal business attire too, isn’t it lucky most animals are colour blind? There was even a Leprechaun, supremely attired in all green with a check waistcoat and top hat. Do they really have leprechauns in Honolulu then butt? The Vet’s shirts were finally returned but not to The Vet’s satisfaction, Geezer had ironed his! Oh dear, oh dear. Crumpled not creased next time, me old china.

And so it was that Llandovery was breached. It’s a quiet market town as different to Ebbw as a pig to a coil of tinplate. Church Bank, home of Llandovery RFC has fine facilities though and a well appointed Club House. On Boxing Day the Club House looked as if Jackson Pollock on speed had attacked it. When I arrived Jackson had covered half with his splashes and spots of colour and ten minutes later he’s done the rest too. In the middle of this high definition screen saver sat five Llandovery fans clad in traditional Barbour green and tweed with flat caps, a sober contrast to the carnage of colour plastered all around them. They clearly had never seen anything quite like it before. ‘My God that last pint of Bishop’s Armpit was strong’ one was heard to mutter.

The grandfather, grandmother, father and mother of one of Ebbw’s players walked in. Grandma’s face said it all, so many familiar people dressed like, well, Hawaiians she looked to her husband for solace, he shrugged and said ‘well I don’t know where the brightness control is, love’. I could tell she was worried about the sort of people her beloved grandson would be mixing with after his on field duties were done.

And so to the game. Well it was never going to be a Hawaii 5 0 for Ebbw. It was a cold misty day not unlike Honolulu except that it was two o’clock in the morning there. Llandovery are a tough uncompromising side on their on patch but Ebbw did scrape in 9 – 13 and scored the only try, a glorious break in the centre by the hooker. Really. The terraces looked nice though as if wallpapered by a gang of decorators who never talked to each other and who overdone the Christmas spirit. The atmosphere was nice though, hardly any beer split never mind blood. Even the backroom boys joined in with the rest. At the final whistle Ron the baggage and water man sprinted onto the pitch in a spectacular red affair rather than his traditional and rather more subdued navy blue track suit top.

Spent shredded wrapping paper drifted like tumble weed across Church Bank as the floodlights were extinguished, the fog blew in and the gloom descended. Shiny tinsel in red, silver and yellow glistered in the surreal light as it flew over exiting fans heads, who said that Banks don’t have real gold in them any more? Church Bank did on that day. This was an afternoon of many golden moments.

The Monarchs returned that evening in celebration and inebriation, retracing their steps, if they could. It is rumoured one met a farm girl and will never return. She said his shirt reminded her of a cow’s afterbirth and was smitten. Romance still lives on in Carmarthenshire. The rest returned home or like translucent breasted starlings roosted together at the Welfare, the newly named for Christmas, Ebbw Vale Rugby Club until they fell off their perches.

Some of the shirts may never see the light of day again. Many will exhale a sigh of relief at that news, for others the memory of that idyllic day at Llandovery will be invoked every time they don their sunglasses and look at their shirt.

Ah, what a day but days don’t last and thoughts soon turn to new challenges in the future. For the supporters’ club what a challenge they will be. For surely this must be the start of a Boxing Day tradition, please it must! What will it be on Boxing Day 2007, Vicars and Tarts? Bride and Groom? Freddie Mercury? Super Heroes? Whatever. Will it, can it, match the day when the Monarch butterflies migrated to Llandovery, December 26th 2006?

Post Op

I’m back home recuperating from my operation to sort out my shoulder. The op was yesterday afternoon at the Sancta Maria Hospital in Swansea. It’s a private hospital, which the NHS is using to help reduce waiting lists. And very nice too.

The staff all had time to talk through the procedure – I saw five or six different nurses and doctors in the first hour I was there. I had a room with views over Swansea Bay; the hospital has even won awards for its food. Consultant Mark Pritchard and anaesthetist Dr King were very thorough, and the op seemed to go OK.

My arm is in a sling today and I’m dosed up on painkillers, but the fact that I’m writing this must be a good sign. Definitely off work the rest of this week, and then I’ll have to see how quick the recovery is.

Music Notes

There are some brilliantly tongue-in-cheek customer reviews on Amazon for A Whole New World by Katie Price and Peter Andre. Check it out before Amazon takes down the reviews page. Here’s just a taster:

“When I first put this CD on I dropped to my knees and wept. They were strange tears, full of both the sublime melancholy of the knowledge that I would never hear music better than this again.”

“After listening to this, I feel different. A different person, a better person. Colours are sharper, sounds are clearer. It's like this album has opened window to my soul and exposed it to the world!”

“If a half plastic model with below average looks/talent and a greasy Aussie with severe nasal problems can come up with a gem of a CD like this then there is hope for all of us!”

Proud to be British

Only in Britain can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

Only in Britain do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in Britain do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.

Only in Britain do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.

Being British is about driving in a German car (in my case either Japanese or French) to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Chinese on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and watch American and Australian shows on a Japanese TV.

And the most British thing of all? Suspicion of all things foreign!

Rugby Notes

Alex Codling sums it up rather well as reported in the Western Mail report of Ebbw Vale’s 28-17 win at Llangennech in the Cup. The players seemed to be distinctly lacking in motivation and played the first half like they would rather be anywhere else than there.

Ebbw struggled to control the game, had some poor control in the tight and some optimistic passes amongst the backs, and consequently spent most of the game trailing. It was only in the last half hour that strength and pace started to show through, and an 11 point win flattered us somewhat.

Scorers: Three tries for the wingers (two for Matt Jess and one fro Simon Hunt), a penalty and a conversion for Sam Mills and two penalties and a conversion for replacement stand-off Dai Langdon.

Highlights: Solid first game for permit player Dafydd Owen and reasonable debut for newly signed hooker Rhys Williams from Glamorgan Wanderers. Nice to see a couple of players coming back from long term injuries – Jon Hawker had a good game, although looked lacking in match fitness, and Matt Griffin played well after coming on to replace Neil Edwards,

Lowlights: It is pretty obvious that the club doesn’t have a great deal of strength in depth, the pack was nothing like as dominant as usual. The death of hooker Darryl Williams’ young son during the week clearly had an effect as well.

My moon shot

I took this picture last night. Cath and I are attending the “Alien Worlds” evening class at the University of Glamorgan. Last night was the first visit to the University’s observatory tower, on top of one of the teaching buildings.

Access is up a stepladder from a shoebox-sized office. The telescope itself is wonderful, the biggest robotic telescope in the UK. It cost over £100,000 to install, but has a wonderfully eclectic mix of old and new technologies. The computer lets the telescope automatically track the stars across the night sky, but the observatory main door is opened by a switch that’s so high up on the wall it has to be operated using a stick.

Car Notes

Both of our cars got vandalised on Tuesday night. Three tyres were slashed, causing a day off work and £150 of damage. The police were called and they dutifully made notes and noises along the lines of “there’s nothing we can do”.

They balked at my suggestion that they should issue guns to citizens to protect their property. I’ll have to make do with a baseball bat.

Killer Sheep

It would be funny if it wasn’t so tragic. Three members of a family from Ebbw Vale were killed last Friday when, it appears, they swerved to avoid a sheep on the Aberbeeg to Crumlin road. Here’s the Western Mail’s story.

It reminds me of my crash caused by a sheep. I was driving from Merthyr to Ebbw Vale on the unlit part of the Heads of the Valleys (A465) road late on a Friday night back in 2005. There was a group of sheep on the road, and I swerved to avoid them. I hit one though, causing over £1,000 of damage to my car and the sheep was a write-off.

I duly reported this to the police, asking that they should find out who owned these sheep so that I could claim against them for the damage to the car. I pointed out that the evidence was lying on the side of the road with its feet in the air. Despite this, they were “unable to identify the owner” and so I copped the hit on my insurance.

Worse still, since the police seem unable/reluctant/not bothered to tell farmers about gaps in their fencing, then there’s nothing happening to stop further incidents happening. Just like the one last Friday night.

If Microsoft made TV dinners

1. You must first remove the plastic cover, but understand that it means agreeing to accept and honor Microsoft rights to all TV dinners. You may not give anyone else a bite of your dinner (which would constitute an infringement of Microsoft's rights). They may, however, smell and look at your dinner. You must tell them how good it is.

2. If you have a PC microwave oven, insert the dinner into the oven. Set the oven using these keystrokes: \mstv.dinn.//08.5min@50%heat//. You then enter: ms//start.cook_dindin/yummy\ /yumyum:-)gohot#cookme. If you have a Mac oven, insert the dinner and press start.

3. The oven will set itself and cook the dinner.

4. Be forewarned that Microsoft dinners are subject to frequent crashes, in which case your oven must be restarted. This is a simple procedure. Remove the dinner from the oven and enter: ms.nodamn.good/tryagain\again/again.crap. This process may have to be repeated, and might solve your problem.

5. Many users have reported that the dinner tray is far too big, larger than the dinner itself, having many useless compartments, most of which are empty. Microsoft says these are for future menu items. However, the tray is so large that it will only fit in the largest industrial ovens, forcing many users to upgrade.

6. Dinners are only available from registered outlets, and only the chicken variety is currently produced. If you want another variety, call Microsoft Help and they will explain that you really don't want another variety. Microsoft Chicken is all you really need.

7. Microsoft has disclosed plans to discontinue all smaller versions of their chicken dinners. Future releases will only be in the larger family size. Excess chicken may be stored for future use, but must be saved only in Microsoft approved packaging.

8. Users get excited about having veggies with their Microsoft dinners, often telling their friends about it, as though this were something new. Microsoft promises a dessert with every dinner after 2004. However, that version has yet to be released. Users have permission to get thrilled in advance.

9. The box for the TV dinners is so large that it will not fit in many smaller freezers, and the shape prevents the storage of any other brand of dinners. Microsoft dinners are often not compatible with other dinners in the freezer, causing your freezer to self-defrost. Calling Microsoft Help will elicit the explanation that your freezer probably should have been defrosted anyway.

One Year Old

This blog is one year old, but shows no signs of growing up.

In the last few weeks alone, the site has had “hits” (stop me if I get too technical) from Peru, India, the Philippines, Argentina, Portugal, Ireland, Canada, the USA and from across the UK. There have been over 500 visits to the site since I started logging traffic in July. That’s far too many people with an unhealthy interest in rugby and life in the south Wales valleys.

I’d like to thank my fans, my agent … (that’s enough Oscars stuff – Ed).

Cube Notes

We’ve had a new voicemail installed. It’s supposed to enable telephone number mobility for hot-desking and even home-working. Of course, the new system doesn’t work yet.

Instead, if I’m not at my desk callers get the greeting “Welcome to Hi-Path Expressions”. People I’ve spoken to think that they have mistakenly rung either a beauty parlour or a greeting card company.

Astronomy Notes

As we were sitting in week 2 of our Astronomy course at the University of Glamorgan, the strains of a Glenn Miller-style big band could be heard as they practiced nearby at the campus. The song? Van Morrison’s Moondance.

Sustainable BS

I’m tired of being lectured at by politicians and celebs like Bonio on why I shouldn’t fly any more and not eat food that’s travelled more than a couple of furlongs.

Rod Liddle has similarly got his arse in his hand. Here’s an extract from Sunday’s article:

“Somebody should do an audit to work out the size of the carbon footprint left by members of the Green Cretinati, such as pop stars hectoring us on air travel from luxury rainforest lodges and David Cameron scampering up the wrong glacier. This was the week of politically correct environmental destruction by the useless royals. Chazza is planning a round trip of 7,000 miles on a fuel-hungry Boeing to New York simply to pick up a Global Environmental Citizen prize. This jaunt is probably the equivalent of personally strangling 500 dolphins, or uprooting 1,000 trees, or stabbing a couple of pandas in the throat.

“Responding to the furore, Charles said he would not be going skiing in Klosters, a trip he may not have intended to take in the first place. In that spirit I pledge that I will not travel to Mozambique next week. “

Great stuff. The full article is here.

Thought for the day

Only in Britain can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.

This week’s sign of the apocalypse

It’s reported that school head Robert Gardner wants pupils to wear slippers so the polished wood floor at the new £5million Willowtown Primary in Ebbw Vale will not be scratched.

Magic Notes

One of the more bizarre things I’ve seen in recent times was the magician with the mullet at Amanda’s 40th bash on Friday night. He was “Vladimir Demetri Kokov from the former Russian republic of Moldovia”. In reality he was a really funny guy with a good magic act and a dodgy accent from Barry.

Travel Notes

1. Had a meeting in Birmingham yesterday. This involved catching a train. Or more specifically, four trains just to get there.

First there was Arriva Trains Wales from Ponty to Cardiff, then First Great Western (Last Worst Western according to some) to Bristol, Virgin Trains to Birmingham New Street and Centro out to the ‘burbs. Bizarrely the return journey was yet another company, Central Trains. If it takes five railway companies to run a service covering 110 miles, no wonder the railway system in Britain is in such chaos.

I have to say that, overall, the experience was a good one; all the trains ran on time and there were seats available. I know that it’s not a representative sample though, and a wider range of views on the state of the railways can be found in this chat forum.

2. My Arriva train into Cardiff was delayed the other morning, so there was an announcement at Radyr that to make up time the train would run “non-stop” to Cardiff.

Of course, this doesn’t actually mean that it goes any faster: it simply stops in the countryside instead of at platforms. It missed 3 station stops and made 3 countryside stops instead. Needless to say we didn’t make up any time at all.

It’s pretty obvious really. Last time I checked trains can’t overtake each other when there’s only one set of rail tracks.

Rugby Notes

Another fine win for Ebbw Vale on Saturday, this time at Swansea, 23-18. It’s not often that we come away from St Helens with a win, which made this result even sweeter. Another great display by the forwards, and they were rewarded with three tries for the front row union. Swansea had the best player on the field in openside Ben Lewis.

Other results mean that we have now opened up a four point lead. Here’s the latest table.

Next Saturday Ebbw visits Llangennech in their first round and last 32 of the Konica Minolta Cup.

Scorers: 2 tries for “meaty” prop Kristian Gay (that’s what the Swansea Evening Post called him – rather them than me) and one for new hooker Ben Roberts. One conversion and two penalties for the ever-improving Dai Langdon.

Highlights: The rolling maul, which finally took hold late in the game and sealed the victory.

Lowlights: The dismal effort by the ref, who singularly failed to penalise Swansea’s wheeling in the scrum, the flankers not binding at the scrum and the endless niggle that always seem to happen in a Swansea game.

In other rugby notes, the picture at the top of this post is of Toulouse’s sub Trevor Brennan landing a punch on a fan, who probably said something naughty to him. There’s a full match report here.

NFL Notes

It was the worst possible set of results on the weekend.

The evil and charisma-free Peyton Manning and his Indianapolis Colts beat the New England Patriots 38-34 in a nail-biter. The Pats had plenty of chances to put the game away, having had a 21-3 lead in the first quarter. A couple of huge drops by Reche Caldwell late in the game gave the Colts the chance to come back. And come back they did.

In the earlier game, the Chicago Bears beat (newly anointed as America’s team) the New Orleans Saints 39-18. Chicago’s Rex Grossman passed for just 144 yards, but didn’t throw any interceptions and their running backs accounted for 199 yards. My worry is that if Drew Brees can get 250 yards against them then the evil Manning could do well.

Full stories are on Sports Illustrated’s website. The Superbowl on 4 February will be Bears and Colts at Miami, and I’ll be firmly supporting the Bears.